The last time I posted I was on a traveling high and simmering in the good life of Berlin. I went to Paris, which was beautiful, but didn't even compare to Berlin as far as the comfort. Boston was super fantastic. I don't know if it was the accents or the small feeling of a big city that got me, but I wouldn't mind living there one day.
All of that brings me to 2008. Wow, how life is a changing. I view it as waves coming over me and crashing. I feel every bit of it, but embrace it because like it or not, I'm going to get wet. I will officially be a college graduate March 11. This is the day I take my last final as an undergrad! Can you believe it? This journey has taken me 5 flippin' years, but I am almost there and I can taste it. I will be attending Grad school in the Fall. I no longer work in the fashion industry; thank God! I now am working for a therapist and the job is a lot calmer. I am also on the beginning of my path of independence. Like Forrest Gump once said, " Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what your gonna get." And for this part of my life, that quote is quite fitting. I'm excited though for all of this change. I won't lie there is fear looming inside of me, but what doesn't kill me only makes me stronger. Whoa! I am on a quote roll.
Life is strange, but it is beautiful. I have been reading a book about Buddhism that has been helping me move through the fear and get to a place of acceptance and excitement. I'm not one for conformed religion, but if I ever needed to choose one it would definitely be Buddhism. The book I am reading talks about bodhichitta. The name broken down, chitta means "mind" and also "heart" or "attitude." Bodhi means "awake," "enlightened," or "completely open." I mean really who couldn't love what that stands for? It just talks about the rawness of feelings and how people try to not feel their feelings because we are taught to hide them or to cover them up and pretend all is well. The author, Pema Chodron, gives an analogy for it, "bodhichitta is the rawness of a broken heart." That is where I am right now; in the middle of all my feelings during the rawness of a broken heart.
I won't leave y'all on a sad note. Instead I will bust out a quote to life you up.
"Right actions for the future are the best apologies for wrong ones in the past." -- Tyron Edwards
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